Someone is Missing

Welcome to Someone is Missing – An Emotional Resource for the Families and Friends of Missing Persons. This new resource has been developed to provide you, as a family member or friend of a missing person, with information about various mental health issues. It recognises that you – and your loved one who is missing – experience significant mental health concerns and these should not be overlooked or trivialised in any way. The information included in this resource provides insights into mental health experiences, as well as practical coping strategies.

This resource is special because it offers information not typically provided by other resources. Existing resources for the family members and friends of missing persons typically provide practical advice about what to do when a loved one is missing (some organisations that might be able to help with this are listed in Chapters Six-Ten). While this information can be very useful these resources usually fail to explore practical ways of coping with the experience of loss. This is why this resource offers only information about mental health matters.

Many of us have a narrow understanding of the term mental health, usually associating it with psychological problems. But, just as we all experience different degrees of health, we all experience different degrees of mental health. It is important to understand mental health in its broadest meaning. It includes both positive experiences, like happiness and contentment, as well as negative experiences, like the stress and strain you may feel because someone you care about is missing.

Yet, it must be recognised that this resource offers only an introduction to mental health matters. You are encouraged to talk to other people about your experiences and concerns – including General Practitioners, the providers of mental health services, your family members and friends, as well as other people who are affected by the disappearance of a loved one. Further details about available sources of support are included in Chapters Six-Ten.

There is no common definition of missing persons universally accepted across all agencies and the community. However, the following are two nationally agreed definitions, the first is used by Australian police and the second is a more "consumer friendly", broader definition:

Law enforcement definition:
“… anyone who is reported missing to police, whose whereabouts are unknown, and where there are fears for the safety or concerns for the welfare of that person.” (Henderson & Henderson (1998, p2)

Consumer friendly definition:
“ Missing is when you are concerned because you can't find someone.” (National Advisory Committee on Missing Persons, 2002).

The resource is divided into ten chapters:
Chapter One: You Are Not Alone
The first chapter looks at how many people go missing in Australia each year. It shows that many people go missing and helps paint a picture of those who do.

Chapter Two: Understanding Your Experiences
The second chapter provides information to help you develop a greater understanding of your personal responses to the situation. It recognises how traumatic it can be when a loved one is missing, and that personal responses can be complex and confusing. This is demonstrated through the stories shared by some family members of missing persons.

Chapter Three: Common Mental Health Issues
The third chapter offers further detail about particular mental health experiences. It explores the mental health issues commonly experienced by the family members and friends of missing persons, as well as appropriate coping strategies. These mental health issues may either be a direct response to hearing that a loved one is missing, or existing conditions may be worsened by the stressful event.

Chapter Four: The Reunion
While not all missing persons are found a large number of them are. Chapter Four explores some of the issues surrounding both short-term and long-term disappearances. It commences by discussing the possible issues that arise when a loved one is found. It then explores what the family members and friends of missing persons typically go through when a loved one is missing for a long time.

Chapter Five: Overview
Chapter Five offers a brief overview of the resource highlighting the themes that were discussed.

Chapters Six-Ten: Sources of Information and Support
In the final chapters we find a list of various sources of support and information. The diversity included in this list attempts to ensure that various needs are catered for.

We hope that this resource offers you the information that might be lacking in existing materials for the family members and friends of missing persons. However, the usefulness of this resource depends solely on one factor – your feedback. We are keen to ensure that this resource meets the special needs of the family members and friends of missing persons. Yet, we can only do this with your advice. If some of the content in this publication is of little use, or perhaps you know of other information that should be included, please contact us. We warmly welcome your feedback – whether it be positive or negative. A feedback form is provided with this resource.

Although this resource may appear lengthy and overwhelming we encourage you to use it as you need. This may mean reading only those parts that are of interest to you, and revisiting the resource at later stages of your personal journey. No matter how you decide to use this resource, there is one message we hope to convey:

Despite the emotional turmoil and heartache associated with the disappearance of a loved one, you can survive – whatever the outcome.

Next Chapter... You are not alone